Sunday, July 17, 2011

Not Broken Just Torn Between Two Loves

    
        Yesterday my heart swelled with sorrow, pride, and happiness! The most beautiful celebration of life unfolded...Carver's memorial. I was smiling and crying the whole time. So blessed to be the Mommy of such a sweet angel. An overwhelming amount of family and friends came to show their love, support, and encouragement. The entire day was perfect thanks to everyone who came and helped.  I believe it was a day that started to heal our hearts. So many people wanted to just make our pain go away, and I love you for that. We all, not just Jared and I, had to give Carver up. A day filled with bountiful bundles of coloring books, hearts pouring out in encouragement and love, children singing, and a final gift to Carver with a release of blue and green balloons. This day will be a day I will reminisce about when I can't fight back the tears. That day will remind me to continue to spread hope and faith.
       Today our family planted a beautiful double blossom weeping cherry tree in honor of Carver. It was a surreal moment. My heart rejoices because Carver has touched so many people's lives in such a short time and has taught us all more about life, love, friendship, family, and most importantly GOD'S LOVE. We will miss him everyday. Carver has taught me to draw nearer to God, to give, to love, to enjoy every moment, and to try my absolute best to be a good Christian, so I can live with Carver in heaven. Thank you God for our "sweetheart" Carver.




Half of an Angel’s Heart

It's a beautiful day up in Heaven. Jesus is rounding up his tiniest
angels, to go live on earth, and be born.


One of the sweetest angels says to Jesus "I don’t want to leave, I
like it here, and I will miss you." He reassures the scared little
angel that everything will be okay, and that he is just going for a visit.


He is still not swayed on this idea. So Jesus, kneels down, and  says, "How about if you leave half of your heart here with me and  take the other half with you, will that be okay?" The angel smiles  and says "I guess that will work.”


But the little angel is still a little scared. He asks, "Will I be
okay with only half of my heart?" Jesus replies, "Of course you
will, I have other angels there that will help out, and you will be
fine."


Then Jesus gives the angel more details about his plan, he
says, "When you are born, your Mommy and Daddy will be scared, so you have to
be strong, and when you feel weak just remember that I have the  other half of your heart." "Enjoy your time with your family, play and laugh everyday."


"And when its time to come back to Heaven, I will make your heart
whole again." "Always remember, that you are not broken, just torn
between two loves."

1 comment:

  1. I have been SO inspired by your story! Your strength and Carver's strength through this has been an inspiration! I also admire your outlook even after it was clear that Carver wasn't meant for a long life here on Earth, but rather an eternal life in heaven where he has been made whole! 4 years ago, on July 11, I delivered my first child, a baby girl, Babe B. Hutchins. She was born sleeping. We later found out that she had a hole in her heart called a VSD. It was causing oxygenated blood to mix with unoxygenated blood and being pumped to the wrong areas of the body. We didn't have any idea that there was ever a problem until she just stopped moving. I love your comment about "...to enjoy every moment, and to try my absolute best to be a good Christian, so I can live with Carver in heaven." I have said this myself and people look at me like I am strange. I guess for me, Babe B. gives me that connection to heaven that helps me to keep my sight on living a Christian life to reach heaven someday which means also seeing her again! We have been praying for you and will continue to do so! God Bless!

    Lacie Hutchins
    Wichita, Kansas
    (I am a friend of Brian's)

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