Not Broken Just Torn Between Two Loves

    
        Yesterday my heart swelled with sorrow, pride, and happiness! The most beautiful celebration of life unfolded...Carver's memorial. I was smiling and crying the whole time. So blessed to be the Mommy of such a sweet angel. An overwhelming amount of family and friends came to show their love, support, and encouragement. The entire day was perfect thanks to everyone who came and helped.  I believe it was a day that started to heal our hearts. So many people wanted to just make our pain go away, and I love you for that. We all, not just Jared and I, had to give Carver up. A day filled with bountiful bundles of coloring books, hearts pouring out in encouragement and love, children singing, and a final gift to Carver with a release of blue and green balloons. This day will be a day I will reminisce about when I can't fight back the tears. That day will remind me to continue to spread hope and faith.
       Today our family planted a beautiful double blossom weeping cherry tree in honor of Carver. It was a surreal moment. My heart rejoices because Carver has touched so many people's lives in such a short time and has taught us all more about life, love, friendship, family, and most importantly GOD'S LOVE. We will miss him everyday. Carver has taught me to draw nearer to God, to give, to love, to enjoy every moment, and to try my absolute best to be a good Christian, so I can live with Carver in heaven. Thank you God for our "sweetheart" Carver.

Half of an Angel’s Heart

It's a beautiful day up in Heaven. Jesus is rounding up his tiniest angels, to go live on earth, and be born. One of the sweetest angels says to Jesus "I don’t want to leave, I like it here, and I will miss you." He reassures the scared little angel that everything will be okay, and that he is just going for a visit. He is still not swayed on this idea. So Jesus, kneels down, and  says, "How about if you leave half of your heart here with me and  take the other half with you, will that be okay?" The angel smiles  and says "I guess that will work.” But the little angel is still a little scared. He asks, "Will I be okay with only half of my heart?" Jesus replies, "Of course you will, I have other angels there that will help out, and you will be fine." Then Jesus gives the angel more details about his plan, he says, "When you are born, your Mommy and Daddy will be scared, so you have to be strong, and when you feel weak just remember that I have the  other half of your heart." "Enjoy your time with your family, play and laugh everyday." "And when its time to come back to Heaven, I will make your heart whole again." "Always remember, that you are not broken, just torn between two loves."

A Healed Heart in Heaven

Carver Lee Cobb

June 7^th, 2011- July 12^th, 2011

Our sweet, brave Carver Lee Cobb was born June 7^th, 2011 at 1:03 pm. He weighed 6 lbs. 2 oz. and was 18 inches long. With soft, pink skin, chubby cheeks, and peach fuzz, he was so beautiful. We all, family and friends, anticipated his arrival and prayed for courage and strength. It is amazing how even though Carver was only with us for a short period of time, he made a lasting impression on so many lives. Because of the precious gift God gave us our lives have changed forever. Through Carver, God has made us better family members, better friends, better parents, better Christians, and better people. Jared and I feel so blessed that God trusted us with His son Carver, and we loved him as much as possible. Now we will cherish those moments we had with him like the way his baby blues eyes sparkled, the way he would suck in his lip and pout out his chin, the incredibly tight grip he had saying please don’t leave yet, the way he amazed his nurses and doctors by sucking a paci even though he was so sick, or how proud Corbin was to be Carver’s big brother. Even though Carver had a condition called Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome and was labeled as having half a heart, he had more heart and courage than anyone I know.  And he strengthened our hearts greatly. We wanted Carver to come home with us so badly, but we knew that his home was not with us. So we told Carver how much we loved him, how proud he made us, and then we told him to go home to Jesus. We will miss our son, but he will forever remain in our hearts and our memories. Thank you God for our gentle warrior, our fighter, our brave heart, our miracle, our angel…OUR baby Carver Lee.

                                                                                                 Heart Hugs and Hope